The OurWeddingDay Blog

Deciding on wedding coordinators should be the first big decision you make after you get engaged. The reason is this: ideally, wedding coordinators should be able to save you money on vendors and offer invaluable advice throughout the planning process, so the sooner you book her, the sooner you can use her wealth of knowledge and experience.

Decide what type of wedding coordinator you want. There are two main types: Personalized wedding planners and day-of coordinators.

A personalized wedding planner is usually with you throughout the entire planning process, helping you to select vendors, keeping you on track with timelines and checklists, providing you with helpful wedding planning tools, helping you to negotiate prices, helping you decide your menu, and potentially helping with a host of other details. This type of planner usually costs anywhere between $1,000 and $10,000.

A day-of coordinator can be invaluable. This person will take care of the million tiny details on the day of your wedding, hopefully bringing you incredible peace of mind. This type of coordinator usually costs between $400 and $3,000.

Do your research and get referrals. You want to make sure this person is thoughtful and understanding, as well as being organized, experienced, and knowledgeable. This person does not need to be bossy and overbearing to get the job done correctly, but you want to make sure that she knows how to execute tasks. Make sure you speak to former clients to find out if they were happy with this person.

Also, go with your instinct. A coordinator may be excellent, but simply not the right fit for you and your fiancé. You need to make sure this planner is a person who you can communicate honestly with, and who takes the time to listen and understand the type of wedding you want.

Understand how this person operates with vendors. Some wedding planners get a finder’s fee for referring you to certain vendors. For example, if you end up hiring a catering company that your planner referred you to, then the catering company will give your planner a commission. However, some people (vendors and clients included) do not feel comfortable with this. Vendors may feel it is unethical, while clients want to be completely objective when choosing a vendor. They don’t want to be pressured to choose a caterer because a wedding planner has a special arrangement with them.

However, (by getting a finder’s fee), other wedding coordinators feel this is a way to keep their rates low. It really all depends on how you – as the bride -- feel about it. The main thing is that you should choose your vendors based on what you truly like, no matter what type of planner you hire.

Figure out how your planner charges. There are many ways a wedding planner can charge. Some charge by the hour, some charge according to the services provided, others determine what you want and charge a flat rate, and other give you a pricing chart with different packages and options. It is probably a good idea to speak to a few different wedding coordinators to compare rates and prices.

Read more:

• Hiring Your Wedding Planner
• Get to Know Your Wedding Planner
• Last Minute Wedding Planner Meetings

Choosing the right wedding planner is just as important as choosing the right dress. Since you’ll rely on your wedding planner to ensure your big day goes smoothly, it’s imperative that you choose someone you can count on. The question is: how do you find a wedding planner you trust? The following questions will help you get to know wedding planners and find the right person for the job.

Initial Questions
When you first speak to a wedding planner, either over the phone or in person, ask them the following questions. If you feel it isn’t a good fit right away, don’t waste their time and politely excuse yourself after thanking them.

• Do you have your wedding planner certification, and if so where did you obtain it?
• Do you have a business license?
• Where did you go to college, and what was your major?
• How long have you been a wedding planner, and do you plan on sticking with this career for the rest of your life?
• What inspired you to become a wedding planner?
• Out of every event you’ve worked, are there any significant challenges that were difficult to handle?
• How many weddings have you planned to date? How often do you work? If they do not work fulltime, ask what they do with the rest of their week.
• If you like what you hear so far, ask if your wedding date is available.

Venue Specific Questions
Once you see the potential to work with that wedding planner, move on to more detailed wedding day questions.

• If there are weather issues on the day of the wedding, what is the best way to make sure the show still goes on without compromising the guests comfort?
• Do I have the freedom to choose my own vendors such as wedding catering services, or is that solely your job?
• Will you assist us in the review of vendor contracts?
• Will the vendors, such as the DJ and the wedding caterer, get paid through you or us? If they are in charge of paying the vendors ask if they distribute the checks on the day of the wedding.
• What type of planning do you supply? Expect them to tell you about floor planning, timelines, etc.Are you the type of wedding coordinator who does creative work, such as decorating, as well as logistical? (Check out your complete wedding checklist here)

These questions will get you well on your way to finding the wedding planner that fits your needs. Before interviews, make sure you have an idea of what your wedding day requires from a wedding planner and how involved you’d like them to be.

Read more:

• Hiring Your Wedding Planner
• Hiring a Part-Time Wedding Planner
• Last-Minute Wedding Planner Meetings

When searching for vendors, it’s become more common to find limited time packages as an optional service. Basically, this allows the vendor to work on a smaller time frame, for less money than an entire day. There are pros and cons, so consider your own situation when making decisions.

With limited time packages, “The vendors coordinate with you,” says Danielle Bobish of Curtain Up Events in New York City. “If it’s a photographer, you need to discuss what exact time the wedding will start, and what time is the cake-cutting,” she says. Since there’s not a lot of wiggle-room, this leads to compromises. “You need to figure out what’s essential for each vendor, and what you can do without. You probably won’t get every element of your wedding covered.”

It’s common for a limited time package to run for about six hours, and you’ll have to stick to the schedule. “A good vendor will remind you when they need to leave,” says Bobish. “If you need them to stick around, they might allow 20 minutes or so, but after that you should expect to pay them overtime.”

Since no one wants to feel rushed at your wedding, you need to figure out ahead of time if a limited time package is a reasonable way to go. “If your wedding is extravagant, it’s not always wise to go for the cheaper package.” Although most vendors are available for overtime, it adds up. Also, don’t expect a vendor to stay and work for free just because you’re having a fabulous wedding. “You wouldn’t expect your grocery clerk to work for free and you shouldn’t expect it of a vendor.”

While the most common limited time packages come from photographers and videographers, it’s catching on in other areas too, like part-time wedding planners. As more people find ways to save, more vendors are setting up some sort of smaller plan. Discuss with your vendors, balance your budget, and figure out the long or short of your day.

Read more: Hiring a Part Time Wedding Planner, Negotiating Fees with Vendors, Vendors who Overcharge or Under-Deliver Services

The world (or at least the news cycle!) seemed to stop this weekend for Chelsea Clinton's wedding.  It was a beautiful affair, but one that obviously had to be high-security.  What was that experience like?  Ask Bryan Rafanelli.

Bryan Rafanelli is a Boston-based event planner who managed the Clinton weekend wedding extravaganza, said in an interview on Sunday that he required confidentiality agreements with approximately 24 vendors and 450 guests!  Read his New York Times interview here.

That certainly sounds like a lot to handle, and it's only the very beginning of wedding planning.  Wedding planners are in charge of a whole host of details, so if your budget allows for it, hiring a planner is a smart idea.  If your budget is too tight for a full-timer, consider a part-time wedding planner.  You'd be amazed at all they do.  Just ask Chelsea!

The week before you wedding is like three minutes before curtain goes up at a Broadway show; you’ll have jitters, emergencies, and tons of stress. You’ll also be having the time of your life. Here’s an idea of what to expect, what to do, and how to make it seven days you’ll never forget.

Most important, says wedding planner Danielle Bobish, do not take anything for granted. “People think there’s going to be extra time,” she says, “but keep in mind all the things that are taking place, starting with guests coming into town.”

During that week, welcome bags need to be dropped off at hotels, all cards (programs, place cards, seating charts) need to be printed and handed to the appropriate persons. The week before is also when you check with your vendors to make sure they’re confirmed, and that their schedules are coordinated. “Never assume anyone has the correct information,” says Bobish. “That includes the clergyperson.”

The week of your wedding is also when tuxes will arrive, and perhaps the bridesmaids’ dresses and even your own dress, depending on when you schedule the last fitting. “Unless you have a planner, all these duties have to be assigned to people in your family or wedding party,” says Bobish.

Some of the things that often get overlooked, according to Bobish, are the marriage license (“don’t forget to bring it with you”), and personal toasting flutes or cake-cutting servers. “If you haven’t scuffed your shoes yet, break them in,” says Bobish. “On the day of your wedding, put a little hairspray on the bottom so you don’t trip.”

Make sure that, if there are major changes in your wedding, you send a mass email to guests. You should also post updates on your wedding website. You and your groom should confirm travel plans, and write out a timeline of what needs to be done and when.

“Have a list for everyone in the party,” says Bobish. “They need to know when the rehearsal is, the rehearsal dinner, who’s giving toasts, everything.” Bobish says this is especially important if children are in the wedding, as they need extra time to rehearse.

Finally, relax and releve stress.  “Schedule time for yourself,” says Bobish. “If you can book a massage for the day before your wedding, you’ll be one step ahead of the game.”

Check Out the Day Before Your Wedding Checklist here!

Take a deep breath, shake out those jitters and make sure all your last-minute details are covered. Use this easy checklist to iron out the final tasks before your wedding. Once everything is in place, you’ll be relaxed on the day before your wedding.

• Call each of your vendors to confirm arrival times and any last-minute details. When you call your caterer, give your final head count. If you haven’t officially scheduled group shots with your wedding photographer, do this now.
• If you’re traveling directly after your wedding, start packing at least three days before the ceremony.
• Email your bridesmaids and groomsmen with a list of everyone’s cell phone numbers and email addresses so that everyone can coordinate and communicate when they’re in town for the wedding.
• Wear your wedding shoes around the house for a few hours at a time if you’ve never worn them before. Just be cautious to avoid blisters or soreness before your big day.
• Give checks and tips in envelopes to your wedding organizer so that he or she can pay your vendors at the appropriate times on your wedding day. If you’re not working with a wedding planner, assign this task to a close friend or relative. If you don’t have a wedding planner, you also need to ensure that someone reliable can bring home your wedding gifts after the reception.
• Take care of yourself—non-wedding-related activities can be one of your most important wedding planning tools. Schedule some light time at the gym, an early morning walk or a movie night with your girlfriends. If you find yourself getting stressed out, remind yourself that you’re prepared and move on to something distracting and fun.

Starting to get overwhelmed by wedding planning? Minimize stress before your wedding by planning online ahead of time. By centralizing your wedding planning online, you’ll work your way to stress-free days before your wedding. Here are some tips for using the Internet to your advantage:

Get Assistance

• Hire a wedding organizer to help you locate and book vendors. If you’re out of town or low on free time, work with a wedding planner who can communicate with you by email, video chat or instant messaging.
• Schedule regular phone calls as you work through your wedding planning checklist.
• Make sure your wedding organizer will be on hand the day before your wedding and on the day of your wedding to help you with last-minute tasks.

Browse the Web

• Search for local vendors, wedding locations and wedding dresses online.
• In most cases, you’ll eventually need to visit locations and shops in person. But until then, you can narrow down your choices significantly by checking out websites and images.
• Consider a vendor’s website to be a preview. If the website doesn’t exude quality, approach the vendor with caution.

Use Technology

• Use your web browser to save interesting bookmarks.
• Organize websites based on category early on, then get rid of bookmarks once you’ve located and booked your final choices.
• Keep your vendors, emails and phone numbers in your cell phone for easy access.

Following celebrity weddings and reading glamorous bridal magazines can be a lot of fun, but nothing’s more helpful than learning how real brides plan their big day.  With that in mind, meet OWD's Real Brides: real OurWeddingDay.com brides-to-be sharing their experiences every day.  It’s not about the “right” way to plan; it’s about each bride planning the wedding that’s right for her.

With wedding bells and endless amounts of tulle in mind, I started planning my wedding two weeks after Mr. Right popped the question. What can I say, I’ve been dreaming about this day since I was almost out of the womb!

The first thing we did was select our bridal planner, which wasn’t as easy a task as I had expected to be. Jay and I had a mini-argument about which bridal planner to use. The one he wanted to get was ugly but had tons of little pockets to store receipts and paperwork in.  I wanted a really pretty, slightly less organized one. I told him that if I had to look at the thing for the rest of my life it was going to have to be pretty. So I, with a reluctant fiancé in tow, marched up to the counter and bought it. From that day on, that book and I have been best friends.

From the get-go I have included Jay in all of the planning. Most of my guy friends I talk to tell me when they get married they want the girls to take care of the details and they will just show up. Not the case with my guy. I’m really happy that he wants to be as involved with the wedding planning process as I am, which means he will be able to enjoy that day with as much pride and joy as I am knowing that we pulled it off together.

I guess the hardest thing to keep in mind is where we stand on our budget which is close to $13,000.  I have become aware that that isn’t very much money in the wedding industry, especially because I’m planning a wedding consisting of about 350 guests (which is another story all in it’s own). We ended up making the decision to plan our wedding all by ourselves in order to forgo the extra cost. We haven’t worked out the ‘wedding day’ mechanics yet but we know that the day before we are going to set up the décor for the ceremony venue  and reception, before the rehearsal. I barely have any ideas about the ceremony decorations but we’ve been dreaming up ways to decorate the reception.

Needless to say we are having to crunch on our spending for the wedding items. A lot of our shopping I am doing online through stores like ThingsRemembered.com for our cake serving set, ebay for various items, and InvitationsByDawn.com for our invitations and our guest book as well. I guess I can be called quite the online bride. I am ALWAYS online looking at wedding stuff trying to find the right candelabras for the main table or the right aisle runner.

The thing I would recommend to every bride that have REALLY is a wedding planner book, complete with plenty of checklists.  My parents have been complete angels about everything including taking me dress shopping. I had done quite a bit of window shopping online and seriously considered ordering online but I really didn’t want to skip out on the trying-on-the-dress experience. I work right across from a David’s Bridal so I stopped in. I had seen their site previously to going in so I knew what I wanted and it was the first dress I tried on. I had fallen in love with it online but I fell in love with it when I put it on also. The size was perfect as well. So I rang fiancé and said (ever so sweetly!), “baby, I found the dress.”  In a few minutes we had it all wrapped up and ready to take home. So excited!